Good Family Man

That is what I work towards.

The Paradox of Our Age

January 13, 2021 by John Crosby Leave a Comment

The paradox of our time in history is that we have taller buildings but shorter tempers; wider freeways, but narrower viewpoints. We spend more, but have less; we buy more, but enjoy less. We have bigger houses and smaller families; more conveniences, but less time. We have more degrees but less sense; more knowledge, but less judgment; more experts, yet more problems; more medicine, but less wellness.

We drink too much, smoke too much, spend too recklessly, laugh too little, drive too fast, get too angry, stay up too late, get up too tired, read too little, watch TV too much, and pray too seldom. We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values.

We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often.

We’ve learned how to make a living, but not a life. We’ve added years to life not life to years. We’ve been all the way to the moon and back, but have trouble crossing the street to meet a new neighbor. We conquered outer space but not inner space.

We’ve done larger things, but not better things.

We’ve cleaned up the air, but polluted the soul. We’ve conquered the atom, but not our prejudice. We write more, but learn less. We plan more, but accomplish less. We’ve learned to rush, but not to wait. We build more computers to hold more information, to produce more copies than ever, but we communicate less and less.

These are the times of fast foods and slow digestion; big men and small character; steep profits and shallow relationships. These are the days of two incomes but more divorce; fancier houses but broken homes. These are days of quick trips, disposable diapers, throwaway morality, one night stands, overweight bodies, and pills that do everything from cheer, to quiet, to kill. It is a time when there is much in the showroom window and nothing in the stockroom. A time when technology can bring this essay to you, and a time when you can choose either to share this insight or to just hit delete.

Remember, spend some time with your loved ones, because they are not going to be around forever.

Remember to say a kind word to someone who looks up to you in awe, because that little person soon will grow up and leave your side.

Remember to give a warm hug to the one next to you, because that is the only treasure you can give with your heart and it doesn’t cost a cent.

Remember to say “I love you” to your partner and your loved ones, but most of all mean it. A kiss and an embrace will mend hurt when it comes from deep inside of you.

Remember to hold hands and cherish the moment for someday that person will not be there again.

Give time to love, give time to speak, and give time to share the precious thoughts in your mind.

and always remember…

Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.

– Dr. Bob Moorehead

Filed Under: For You, For Your Kids, For Your Wife, Notes to The Kid

Taking Care of Yourself

January 10, 2021 by John Crosby Leave a Comment

You do a really good job of taking care of yourself physically. You work out, you eat right, but that’s not all there is. Your mind needs to be in good shape too. What does that look like? I think it’s different for everyone, so it might take a little experimentation to discover what works for you.

Some Ideas

  • Read: You know you like to do it. Plus it provides you with mental stimulation, stress reduction, improves your focus, allows you to “escape” without having to go anywhere, and all sorts of other benefits.
  • Write: On paper. It’s good for you.
    • 9 Incredible Ways Writing By Hand Benefits Our Bodies And Brains
    • Writing By Hand Improves Your Memory, Experts Say
    • 3 Scientific Links Between Handwriting Your Notes and Memory
    • Why Writing by Hand Could Make You Smarter
  • Meditate: Being able to calm your mind is a skill. Build that skill.
  • Challenge yourself: Get out of your comfort zone. Learn or do something you might not be good at or even interested in.
  • Remember the past: take the time to remember details of something from your past you love and enjoy. Write it down, you’ll have something comforting to read and add to later when you need it. Why? To remember where you’ve been and to know how far you’ve come.
    • What Happens In The Brain When We Remember Our Own Past?
    • How to Remember the Past
    • The Neuroscience of Recalling Old Memories
  • Take a walk: Get outside. Move your feet. It’s not an intense workout, more of a way to focus and free your brain.
  • Be alone: It’s another skill to develop. Being happy alone releases you from the tethers of always having to be around someone else.
    • How to Be Happy Alone
    • 13 Rules for Being Alone and Being Happy About It
    • Why You Can’t Stand To Be Alone — And How To Learn To Love It
  • Be with people: Find good people to be around and do it. You can also just go to a coffee shop, the gym, or even the mall to be around other people.
  • Talk to a counselor or therapist: Professionals who are trained to help you figure this out are a great resource for solutions and the reason why you might be feeling the way you’re feeling.
  • Observe: Engage with everything around you. This means focusing on things outside of you and disengaging with distractions. Try to find the interesting in the mundane or try to see the everyday differently. Write it down, take photos, or don’t.

Filed Under: For You, For Your Kids, For Your Wife, Notes to The Kid

Resources for Your First Apartment

December 28, 2020 by John Crosby Leave a Comment

What You Might Need

  • Mailing address & pickup
    • Change of address
  • Utilities (Water & sewer, gas, electricity, trash, phone, security, etc.)
    • Billing dates
    • Trash pickup dates
    • Contact numbers
  • Extra set of keys
  • Cleaning supplies
    • Vaccum
    • Broom & dustpan
    • Mop
  • Furniture
  • Bath towels
  • Sheets
  • Toolbox
  • Plunger

From: Moving to Your First Apartment? Tips on What You’ll Need

Utilities

  • Water & sewer
  • Gas & electricity
  • Trash
  • Phone
  • Cable
  • Internet
  • Security

From:
First Time Renters Guide to Utilities
How to Set Up Utilities in Your New Apartment

Budgeting

  • Dave Ramsey is a budgeting Guru
  • How to Make a Personal Budget in 6 Easy Steps
  • The CLARK Method: 5 Steps to Better Budgeting
  • 32 Hacks for Sticking to Your Budget

Budget Spreadsheet Templates

  • Daily Budget Template: The “Poor Mans Budgeting Spreadsheet” – Calculates a daily spending limit base on income and expenses.
    Source: Reddit
  • Monthly Budget Template: A straight forward spreadsheet for monthly tracking that tracks projected against actual income and expenses.

Budget Apps

PocketGuard

PocketGuard iOS

PocketGuard is a free app that makes it easy to take control of your personal finance and stop overspending. Its intuitive money management tools help you make a budget, track spending and build savings automatically. Link your bank accounts & credit cards and track everything from account balances & transactions to net worth and more in one place.

This app is great if you want to make sure you don’t spend too much. The app connects to all your accounts and helps you track your spending throughout the month. It also lets you easily see what you’re spending on recurring subscriptions and everyday expenses.

Wally

Wally iOS

Wally is the best way to track all your accounts, spending and set budgets so you can reach your financial goals easily. Since 2014, Wally has helped millions of people just like you take control of their finances. You’ll love how Wally simplifies your day-to-day finances and puts you in control.

Wally has one of the plainest UI’s on this list, but it’s a great choice for those who want powerful automatic spend tracking. A really cool feature is it offers a built-in receipt scanner, so you can even keep track of cash payments.

ynab icon

YNAB iOS

YNAB—Budget, Personal Finance, Expense Tracker. YNAB will help you break the paycheck to paycheck cycle, get out of debt, and save more money. On average, new users save $600 in the first two months, and more than $6,000 in the first year.

YNAB, or You Need A Budget, is a terrific app for those looking outside the traditional envelope budgeting systems. The app takes your income and builds a budget around it instead. It’s not for everyone, but it’s worth checking out, because it may be perfect for you.

Mvelopes

Mvelopes iOS

YNAB—Budget, Personal Finance, Expense Tracker. YNAB will help you break the paycheck to paycheck cycle, get out of debt, and save more money. On average, new users save $600 in the first two months, and more than $6,000 in the first year.

YNAB, or You Need A Budget, is a terrific app for those looking outside the traditional envelope budgeting systems. The app takes your income and builds a budget around it instead. It’s not for everyone, but it’s worth checking out, because it may be perfect for you.

When Your Lease Is About To End

  • What Happens When Your Lease Is Up
  • So, Your Lease Term Is About to End: 5 Things You Have to Remember to Do

Videos

Filed Under: Notes to The Kid

Do you want a happy life?

November 14, 2020 by John Crosby Leave a Comment

If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not people or things.

Albert Einstein

Filed Under: Notes to The Kid

Free Thinker

November 3, 2020 by John Crosby Leave a Comment

Once in a great while, a child is born who, for reasons unknown to anyone, take possession of its own mind and does its own thinking. When that happens, the world has found a potential free thinker; but the world never has many of this type at any given period. Most people do their thinking at second hand, so to speak, by merely reflecting the thoughts, ideas and beliefs of those around them, and this applies to both children and adults.

Napoleon Hill, How to Own Your Mind

Filed Under: Notes to The Kid

By far the most significant learning experience in adulthood involves critical self-reflection…

October 4, 2020 by John Crosby Leave a Comment

By far the most significant learning experience in adulthood involves critical self-reflection — reassessing the way we have posed problems and reassessing our own orientation to perceiving, knowing, believing, feeling and acting.

Jack Mezirow

Filed Under: Notes to The Kid

7 Cardinal Rules of Life

January 2, 2020 by John Crosby Leave a Comment

Life is but a series of fleeting moments, one forever chasing the next. The only place where you can live, act, and make a difference is the present. Today.

  1. Make peace with your past so it won’t disturb your present.
  2. What other people think of you is none of your business.
  3. Time heals almost everything. Give it time.
  4. No one is in charge of your happiness, except you.
  5. Don’t compare your life to others and don’t judge them. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
  6. Stop thinking too much. It’s alright not to know the answers. They will come to you when you least expect it.
  7. Smile. You don’t own all the problems in the world.

Where did these rules come from?

In 1995, Studio Ghibli, a Japanese anime company, released a movie called Whisper of the Heart. It’s about two high school students struggling with their artistic callings, their feelings for each other, and coming of age.

Filed Under: Notes to The Kid

You’ll never lose. You’ll either win or learn.

November 26, 2019 by John Crosby Leave a Comment

Filed Under: Notes to The Kid

What we resist persists

November 24, 2019 by John Crosby Leave a Comment

Filed Under: Notes to The Kid

Adapt what is useful, reject what is useless and add what is specifically your own. – Bruce Lee

November 24, 2019 by John Crosby Leave a Comment

Filed Under: Notes to The Kid

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