Good Family Man

That is what I work towards.

Get Out Of The House!

September 4, 2014 by John Crosby Leave a Comment

I’m sitting here, in a coffee shop, writing. First time doing it too. Before now I never understood why someone would come to a place that is loud, with plenty of other people around, to get something done. My perspective was wrong. It isn’t about getting something done, well in the end it is, but the reason I’m here is for a change of environment.

Recently I left my job of 11 years and I’ve taken the last month off from doing pretty much anything except what I really wanted to. Side note – thankfully my wife is awesome, and has allowed me to do this with no complaints. Actually she has been one of the biggest forces keeping me from going straight back into work. The past month has been extraordinary, weird, stressful, fun, exciting, disappointing, and most of all revealing.

Revealing

Revealing in that I have really gotten to do everything I had thought I wanted to do but couldn’t for the past 11 years. I’ve found out there are things I wanted to do that I really don’t like and there are things that I had no idea that I would like.

Disappointing

Disappointing because I should have done this SO much sooner, I have wasted a lot of my time.

Exciting & Fun

Exciting and fun, well that one is easy, I’ve had free reign to do whatever I wanted.

Stressful

Stressful – yeah, it has been stressful. My brain has been so used to heads down elbows up hard work for the past 11 years. That stopped immediately. It took me a good while to get over that. Actually, I’m pretty sure I didn’t get over it completely. I think I’ve created work for myself to fill the void that was left. The stress is mostly gone though. Mostly because I still think about what needs to be done soon. I can’t be a stay at home dad forever.

Weird

This experience has been weird because for the past month I’ve been in situations that I have never in my life been in. I’ve had to go on interviews. I’ve had to convince people that I’m worth it to be hired to be on their teams. I’ve been turned down for jobs. All of this is very foreign to me. I’ve always done things in a very laid back manner and have been lucky for it to work out in my benefit. Now, I want to go make something of myself, to go where I want to. Not just where the next thing leads.

It has all be extremely extraordinary because I’ve be allows to discover and realize all of this. I’ve had the support and lots of goading from my family. I didn’t believe that I was actually allowed to do all of this. My family did some hard work to convince me that it was okay for it to happen.

Oh, geeze, that was quite a tangent. It was necessary though. I’m now able to tell you this story because all of this has happened. I’m able to do so in a coffee shop, because I’m comfortable enough to create the story anywhere. I also needed to come to the coffee shop because I’m tired of working at home. Yep, I’m working. This is part of what I want to do with The Good Family Man. I want to tell these stories in the hope that it helps you.

Sometimes You Just Have to Get Out

Aside from a couple of great days in the mountains, I’ve been working at the same desk that I’ve had for years. Sitting at the same chair. Trying out new things. Trying to write in new ways. I needed to get out of the house. So I did. Doing so has changed my perspective. It really did let me create the previous half of this article. The only thing I did was hop on my bike and peddle over to the local coffee shop, have a cup and some quiche and start writing.

The point of this story (epic, diatribe?) is to get out of the house. Change the habit. Try something different, somewhere different. Even if all you do is sit in a chair in the back yard, you’re going to see and feel things differently.

By the way, I’m not at a Starbucks, I’m at a local, small place that is in my neighborhood. Not that Starbucks is awful or anything, I give them plenty of my money. But, I do like giving to local businesses, especially ones that are in my neighborhood.

Filed Under: For You, Uncategorized Tagged With: perspective, to do

What And How You Do Things Really Does Matter

August 28, 2014 by John Crosby Leave a Comment

I’m hope you know this. If you do or don’t I still need to say it. What you do and how you do it really does matter.

I’m Sara’s (my wife) best friend, and she is mine:

  • She wants to spend time with me, so I make time to spend with her.
  • She takes on my problems & feelings, even if I ask her not to. So, I try to be mindful of the way I respond to things.
  • She knows when I’m not happy, and can sense when things aren’t “all good”.
  • We enjoy just being in the vicinity of each other.

See, I really am her best friend, I have proof:

There is nothing like being married to the love of your life, who happens to be your best friend. @jccrosby
— design007 (@design007) August 28, 2014

Even more proof!

I’m thankful for you. My husband, my best friend, my partner in crime!
— design007 (@design007) November 28, 2013

Aidan specifically & kids in general are the most perceptive little beings on the planet:

  • Aidan knows when I’m there or not.
  • He knows when I show up to one of his events.
  • He notices when I make and effort, or don’t.
  • He keeps track of me – probably better than I do.
  • He knows what kind of a mood I’m in.

Anyhow, the point of all of this, is that we have an affect on the people around us. Even more of an affect on our loved ones. So make a conscious effort to think about how you do things. Because what you do and the way you do it really does make a difference.

Filed Under: For Your Kids, For Your Wife, Uncategorized Tagged With: emotion, perspective

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